Everytime I try,
you make it harder on me,
as if my guilt didn't kill enough,
your words come back to haunt me,
I drown you with kindness,
and you strangle me with contempt,
if only you would understand,
what you've been to me,
I love who you used to be,
I deserve a thousand lashes,
but I was blind to your suffering,
you'll never allow me to forget,
confuse me when you speak of reuniting,
how did those pretty thoughts vanish so quickly,
my actions, so childish as I fled and pushed you away,
now that the ugly's gone,
I remember only the beautiful,
and how deep it ran for me,
you became the victim of my cruel hands,
i've never wanted anything more,
than to take back my deviance and mend your wounded heart,
if only there were a way,
i'm so sorry, I should have stayed.